Did we inherit the wind? Are we running against the wind? Do they call the wind Maria? Or does the wind cry Mary?
Maybe the answer is all of the above. Or maybe none of the above. But one thing I can say for certain: Everyone knows it’s windy.
It seems as if the wind hasn’t stopped wreaking havoc upon us since the middle of last year.
In the first place, why is there wind? That’s a little like asking “Why is there air?” Bill Cosby — before he became a punch line — actually did that back when he was a young comedian.
Wind is caused by changes in air pressure and air direction. The natural overall weather pattern — the jet stream, if you will — normally flows from west to east. Storms essentially ride along the jet stream, but they have their own air flow. The difference in air flow, air pressure, air direction and temperature determines the ferocity of the wind.
Now, I am not a meteorologist, which means Bob Dylan was absolutely right: You don’t need a weatherman to tell which way the wind blows.
This isn’t a treatise on climate change. There are enough debates about that. Whatever the reason, it just seems that the predominant weather story so far in 2021 has been wind.
There are warm winds, cold winds and raw winds. And all of them are determined by the direction in which they blow. Have you ever heard Harvey Leonard talk about a Bermuda High? I wouldn’t blame you for thinking that’s some kind of exotic marijuana from the Caribbean. But it’s a high-pressure system emanating from the Caribbean that pumps warm, humid air up the East Coast during the summer.
How about the Montreal Express? That’s not what they call the Canadiens when they careen into town and tap dance on the Bruins. It’s a cold-weather air flow that comes down from Canada and gives the northeastern U.S. sub-freezing temperatures. And it is always accompanied by howling winds. It’s that kind of wind that gives us that wonderful term we hear so often: the “wind-chill factor.”
The celebrated Polar Vortex from a few years back is kind of like the Montreal Express on steroids. It covered a larger area and absolutely clobbered the northern plains states.
Winds coming in off the water can cause wide variations in temperature, even within a close range. They call it The Breeze — as in sea breeze. It’s not really a breeze. It’s more like a gale-force wind in the spring. That’s when Jacob Wycoff on Channel 4 (he’s the one who looks like an elf) will tell you that it’ll be 80 degrees in Worcester but only 50 on the coast. You think he’s an idiot. But he’s not. That’s because of the sea breeze.
In scientific terms, a sea breeze happens when the warm air rises (because that’s what heat does), and creates a vacuum into which the cooler winds from the ocean swoop. From here on out, I will call this phenomenon “Mr. Breeze.”
On the other hand, in the winter, when storms come up our way, they can follow a pattern that leaves them a hundred or so miles off the coast, so that the air flow (fancy term for wind) is cold enough to support snow. Then we get a howling blizzard that dumps three feet of snow on us. And that leads to predictable complaints about snow removal everywhere.
We often call these nor’easters, but we can get them in the spring and even the summer when the wind blows a storm up our way. Then we get a raw wind and an ocean that looks stunning in its ferocity.
But let that storm track about 100 miles inland and, because the water temperature in winter is warmer than the inland air, we get driving rain, fierce winds and often coastal flooding. Either way, there is wind involved.
There’s probably alcohol involved too, such as when a good gust of wind blows a tree onto your house, or drives a tree branch right through your vinyl siding, making a big hole (true confessions: the latter happened at our house during the last windstorm). Then, you may need some fortification before you deal with the situation.
I haven’t seen anyone riding the wind on a broomstick, but I swear that’s coming.
